EX-Narcissist

God created us in his image and after his own likeness. We were created to be LIKE God, not to BE God. But some of us, like Lucifer, have taken our worship off of the Father and have put it on ourselves. Out of pride and self-righteousness, we want popularity, attention, fame and high social status. We strive daily to become man’s #1 idol, but in the end, we will soon come to find out that as servants, we will never be greater than our Master.

Many people, especially in the church, find themselves battling with pride, which is a sin by the way. When one is first called and chosen by God into the Kingdom, they are humble and they hunger and thirst for righteousness and for an intimate relationship with the Father. But once they get a little revelation of the Scriptures, discover their gifts and talents and their specific mantle/assignment in ministry, they develop an ego and the enemy uses that to usher them into a place of self-righteousness. While ministering to the masses, they may have godly intentions at first (the saving of souls), but as they are continuously greeted by the applauds and honor of men for preaching the gospel and for having a great anointing over their life, a weakness begins to develop in them.

Now, instead of directing the worship and praises of the people back to God and giving Him all the credit, they tend to receive some of that glory for themselves (trying to fulfill a void in their hearts by winning the approval and validation of men, instead of being validated by God alone). Instead of being a God-pleaser, they become pleasers of men, and begin to water down the message of the gospel so that they can keep their followers. With a deep fear of being rejected, they start to preach what the people want to hear, thus losing their effectiveness in destroying yokes, because they are not preaching the whole truth anymore, (which has the power to set one free), but rather a watered down version of it. Then, being deceived by Satan into thinking that they don’t need God anymore, because they believe the power to preach, teach, evangelize, minister and effect lives come from within their own strength, they begin to try to do the works of God, without God. But at the end of their life, after all the works they have done for God, he will simply say to them, “Away from me, you worker of iniquity. I never knew you.” They did works for God, but not the will of God. They sold their soul to their church title and position in ministry and lost their humility and love relationship with God in the process.

I know there are many in the church who have fallen for Satan’s trap, but I will make myself first partaker of this status. I was trying to be in God’s shoes and do his job. God showed me that ministry had become my god, my idol, because I was putting it before him. I never got the attention I wanted when in the world, but when I was called into ministry, I noticed that I started to get the attention I always wanted. However, the attention wasn’t really directed to me, but to the anointing of God on my life. People were drawn to the God in me, not me. I was quickly humbled, though, as the Spirit of God had to teach me that I am just a man and I am nothing apart from him, and can do nothing without him. I am just a branch, but Jesus is the true vine. I can’t save anyone, only Jesus can. I am just a vessel that he uses to do his work. I have to die daily to my narcissism, pride, and my desire to please men and win their approval. I am here for one purpose and one purpose only — not to do my own will, but to do the will of the Father. I now know that it was never about me, and never will be. It is all about Jesus Christ, to the glory of God the Father. I have previously repented for my pride-infected ways and God has forgiven me. Amen. This is my first time exposing this about myself publicly. Pray for me. I am just being Transparent.

Confession+Repentance=Deliverance. (Proverbs 28:13)

Narcissist:
-a person who is overly self-involved, and often vain and selfish.
-deriving erotic gratification from admiration of his or her own physical or mental attributes.
-inordinate fascination with oneself; excessive self-love.

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, he must DENY HIMSELF and take up his cross and follow me. (Matthew 16:24)

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. (Philippians 2:3-4)